Sunday 15 September 2013

Good Bye David.

In 1956 I started senior school, and became a founder member at Arundel, which was a very prestigious private school on the outskirts of Salisbury. During the first year, I became friendly with a girl in my class who also rode; her father, who was a judge, helped enormously with the pony club as well. Although the whole family eventually moved to the UK while my friend was in her late teens, we are still very good friends to this day.   As far as I can remember, the school consisted of only 60 girls in the first year it opened. Most of us were in the first two senior forms (I and II), but a  6th form girl  was head girl. We all started out in one room in one of the boarding houses, as the classrooms were not quite finished, but a week or so later, we made our way to our new classrooms and school work began in earnest. The sports fields and swimming pool were very soon all finished and sport became a very important component of the school curriculum. I was a member of the netball and swimming teams, but I hated hockey and I was absolutely useless at tennis!
 Some of the girls from the first day at school. I am 5th from the right, kneeling in the front row.
I have recently discovered that two of the girls that started out with me there are now living in France!  One lives here permanently and the other splits her time between the UK and France.  We all met up earlier this year and had a great reunion.
A staff photo soon after the school opened.  Many I remember well; some because I really liked them, but a couple because I could not stand them!!

My pony Dusky’s first show was at Gatooma in July 1957 and he surprised us all by winning his very first jumping event; he had four second places and one third in the gymkhana events. I was so proud of him and his training had obviously paid off!  Gatooma was in an area called the "midlands" of Rhodesia and a large horse show was held there, alongside the annual agricultural show. During the year, there were always a couple of horse shows there, combined with  race meetings which ran over a whole weekend. A team of Lewisham Riding School riders always used to go down and we stayed on the farm owned by the local butcher. I remember he had a couple of semi-tame zebra there which we tried unsuccessfully to ride on one occasion!  Sadly I do not seem to have photos of of this escapade!

Dusky and me in 1957 at Lewisham Riding School on Parents Day.  I remember at the time being told this was a good photo, as I was already looking ahead to the next fence off to the right!  Dusky can be seen growing out his mane here; this had been clipped off when we bought him. The practice of clipping resulted from there being so many ticks  around farmsteads; also polo players  preferred not to have mane in the way while they were playing!

In August 1957, Mary Adams took a team of horses and riders down to the Rand Show in Johannesburg. Dusky was not up to this standard yet, so he stayed at home, while I took Judy the piebald as my mount. The show was fairly successful with our riding school members getting a number of places, but no wins. It was a major experience for all of us, as the competition was of a very high standard.
 Rosemary, Clive, myself on Judy and Ray on Santa Fe.  Ray was tragically killed by a truck on the road, while out taking a ride at his mother's riding school some years later.

On the way north back home, we all drove  through the Kruger National Park, so we had a holiday as well. On my return, I had the worst possible news waiting for me. While I was away, Mum had in fact phoned Mary Adams with  some terrible news, but it was decided that nothing would be gained from upsetting me  and the news could wait for my return. David had been killed in a car accident on 29 August and he had already been buried by the time I got back to Salisbury. I was devastated by this and I still feel as if part of my own life has been taken away from me. He had so much still to give, and we had so many happy years removed from our futures. I can only think how terrible it must have been for my parents, especially Mum, to have lost a son when he was only 21.
David 1953

David 1956 in his prized MG during his army call up period.

A smiling David during his army call up period.
R.I.P


My Life Before Charente to be continued :-) 

 
The section of my life story during our overland trip is published on Kindle if you should be interested:-
 THE GREAT 1953 TREK
See




24 comments:

  1. I saw the title and knew. Yes, such tragedies are hard to take. You did, however, honor him and his life by telling about it, and showing your relationship with him during your childhood. That is all the living can do for the dead.

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    1. rosaria you of all people know how I feel. I had a loving brother for such a short time, and we both missed so much of what we could have had together in later years. I am glad that I have brought the story out at last, I only wish it made me feel better! As you say all you can do is honour his life and tell of our great relationship. Keep well, Diane

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  2. Chilhood friends are as a brother or sister especialy whem we came back in another region, it is a honor for David to write this article in memory, ife is short, but chilhood memories are strong for everybody. Best regard from Belgium, ex expats katanga

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    1. Thank you for your comment as always much appreciated. It has been a long time now since David and I were together but sometimes it still feels like yesterday. Keep well Diane

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  3. Best regard from Belgium, lovely post memory for a childhood friend

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    1. Thank you retriever, I am grateful for the memories I do have. Have a good week Diane

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  4. I have commented before. And you don't know me. But having enjoyed each and every post, I was shocked at this new entry. I was always so impressed at how resourceful your brother was during your long journey. I am very sorry for your loss. Joan

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    1. Thanks Joan for your comment and kind words, it was a massive loss to us all and I don't think my Mum ever fully got over it. It was many years ago now, but I also think of David often and what could have been. Hope your week is a good one. Diane

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  5. It was a hard moment in your life and I supose you must be very sad when you remember and write about it. His beautiful smile in his young face is a wonderful thing to remember and to keep in your heart. best regards.

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    1. Araceli writing about it now was actually much harder than I expected. I thought that I would be able to write without any tears but I was wrong! Keep well Diane

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  6. I don't know what it is like to lose a brother, but yet I can feel you pain. Wonderful tribute, Diane.

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    1. Thanks JM, even after all this time I wonder what would, or could have been. Have a good weekend Diane

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  7. A very sad ending to a wonderful tale of your horse riding exploits. It must have been devastating for you to return to this horror. How you must miss him, after being so close on your wonderful journey to Rhodesia. This is where our life stories differ. Although I didn't see much of my brother David, after he left home for P/NG when he was 19 and later in life he settled back in the UK but he lived until cancer took him at 71.

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    1. Thanks diane for the comment. Yes very sad, and reliving it here has brought it home even more! We were not only brother and sister, but great friends as well despite the age difference. You must miss your brother as well even though you lived apart for so long. It is hard saying goodbye to family. Keep well and take care Diane

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  8. As I was following your story from the start, I never expected such horrible turn. I saw the title of this post and thought, no, surely not, he was young. I don't know what it is like to lose somebody so close, but my guess is that you are most likely still in pain and missing him very dearly. You paid a lovely tribute to him by telling your story, as it must be a difficult thing to do. You and your parents must have been devastated by the terrible news. Life is a gift, but can also be so harsh.

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    1. Awena as you say he was so young. Life is a gift but I wish it had lasted a bit longer for David. Have a good day Diane

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  9. I have been reading along and promise that one day I will do a review on my blog, just wanted to let you know today how much I feel for you when you write about the dath of your brother.

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    1. Thanks Linda, you of all people must know how I felt loosing someone so close. Writing this post brought tears to my eyes again after all these years and every comment has the same effect. Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal. Keep well and take care. Diane xx

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  10. There are some events in life that you never really get over, you just learn to live your life around them. Losing your brother in such tragic circumstances leaves a mark on you. Perhaps you try to live your life for them, do the things they didn't get the opportunity to do.
    Your love for David lives on.

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    1. Thanks Gaynor, you are so right my love for David will never die, I just wish we could have had more time together. Mais c'est la vie. Thanks for your comment.Stay well Diane

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  11. I have just found your blog and after reading about your brother just had to write. I lost my youngest brother aged sixteen in a motor bike accident & I completely identify with your comment about a part of your life being taken away. My brother died in 1975 so was a long time ago but to me it sometimes seems like yesterday. It was my Dad who never really got over it. My Mum and I still talk about Ian & imagine what he would have done with his life - he was into engines & farming - and we are sure he would have married young & had a string of kids. Like you say - all those lost opportunities & memories are hard to to come to terms with. My Mum says she just tells herself we were lucky to have him for 16 yrs. I am fortunate in that there were 3 of us & so I still have one brother, but it must have been hard for you to suddenly be an only child. Thank you for sharing this with us; the photos of David are wonderful - he looks so handsome in his uniform. Best wishes

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    1. Tricia, thank you so much for your comment and your thoughts. Time does not seem to change our feelings. People say you get over these things and perhaps you do to a certain extent, but never will I forget, and never will I not regret the years we could have had together.. Leaving me as an only child I remember it all like yesterday as well. Writing about it here has brought it back and each comment brings tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing your experience with me, take care Diane

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  12. You brought tears to my eyes, I can feel the pain you've felt about David. I lost a brother from a terrible accident but I got to see him laid to rest.

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    1. Rose every comment I have read here has brought tears to my eyes and yours is no exception. You must know exactly how I felt loosing a brother as I did. Take care Diane

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